November 2010 Archives

If you are asking yourself, "Who are they?", you just realized why I think this choice will be a disaster.

 

Count me among those absolutely stunned this morning when the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences named Anne Hathaway and James Franco as the hosts of this year's Oscars!

 

Why them?

 

Jake Gyllenhaal is naked so often in this movie I felt like I was Taylor Swift.  

Set in 1996, Jake "That Cradle Robbing Pervert" Gyllenhaal stars as Jamie - the sexiest screw up you have ever met.  He might not be good at holding down a job, but the ladies find him and his puppy dog eyes irresistible (as irresistible to the ladies as pumpkin pie is to me).

Seeking a new opportunity, Jamie heads out to Ohio, where he becomes a pharmaceutical salesman for Pfizer.  It's tough to get the attention of doctors he needs to convince to prescribe Pfizer's products, but he does have a knack for charming the nurses and office staff to let him stock the shelves with samples.

Of course, this ladies man can't resist Maggie (Anne Hathaway) - a young patient suffering from a disease with no cure.  She's also smarter, sexier, tougher and more amazing than any woman he has ever met before (Can I get an, "Amen"?!?!), so Jamie is ready to do whatever it takes to strike up a relationship.

Are Jamie and Maggie a match made in heaven?

As Blake Lively will testify, I can't resist a beautiful blonde lady, but Tangled is a fantastic movie for more reasons than that.

Mandy Moore provides the voice of Rapunzel - the princess who was kidnapped as a baby and held in a tower far far away by a nasty old wicked witch, Mother Gothel (Donna Murphy), who uses the magical powers of Rapunzel's golden blonde hair to stay young forever (kind of like Joan Rivers uses plastic surgery).

Each year, on her birthday, Rapunzel watches a spectacular light show, not realizing it is an attempt by the King and Queen to help bring her back.  Now, Rapunzel wants to go to town on her 18th birthday and see the show in person, and someone might be able to help her.

A charming thief, Flynn (Zachary Levi), discovers the young lady, realizes she might be the long lost princess, and promises to bring her to town to help get himself out of a pickle or two.  Of course, the two start to fall for each other along the way.  

Is it true love?

Every year, Hollywood graces me with one lovely, amazing, juicy, delicious turkey for Thanksgiving.  

This year, that turkey is called Faster.  

The Rock (I refuse to call him Dwayne Johnson.  I call him The Rock out of love and admiration) stars as Driver - an ex-con who has dedicated himself to killing the men who murdered his brother, after a bank robbery years ago ended up in a double-cross.  

That's the whole story.

Nothing more.  

Nothing less.   

It's 90 minutes of The Rock hunting people down and killing them.   

Will he kill them all?

Why didn't they just call the movie Kill Them All?

Based on the trailer, when it is released in December, Yogi Bear is the movie that might destroy your soul, but, for now, it is destroying Oscar dreams for animators all across the globe.

Why?

After years of appealing his conviction for willfully failing to file tax returns, Snipes is in custody tonight and being transported to an unnamed Federal prison. 

Earlier today, the United States District Court in Ocala, FL denied the Snipes team's request for a new trial and permission to interview jurors from his 2008 trial. 

Snipes was sentenced to 3 years in custody after being found guilty, but was allowed his freedom during the appeals process. 

It is not clear if he would be eligible for early release.

  

The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences announced the Best Documentary short list today, but it left off one of the most talked about docs of the year in the process.

Familiar titles like Waiting for "Superman", Inside Job and The Tillman Story all find themselves in the running for an Oscar nomination, but the summer's biggest surprise, Catfish, was left out in the cold, as were the two highest grossing docs of 2010, Oceans and Babies. 

The Next Three Days is a bad idea of a movie that gets worse and worse and worse as the film slogs along to an ending that feels tacked on after the fact to make up for everything that came before it.

Lara Brennan (Elizabeth Banks) is having a rotten day.  She had a massive fight with her boss, and dinner with the in-laws ended in bickering, name calling and all around bitterness (sounds like Thanksgiving at your place?).  The next day, while having breakfast with her husband, John (Russell Crowe), and her kid, the police show up in full force.  They storm the house and arrest Lara for murdering her boss!

Flash forward several years later, Lara has been convicted of the crime and she has reached the end of the appeals process.  John still misses her badly and believes in her innocence, so he plots to break her out of prison and live life on the lam, on the run, like a fugitive from justice (does he think a one armed man committed the crime?).  

Harry and Hermoine are making out (without their shirts on!).  

Lord Voldemort and his minions are exterminating non-believers!  

Is this Harry Potter movie directed by Quentin Tarantino?      

Daniel Radcliffe is back as Harry Potter, and the ultimate battle is afoot.  Evil Lord Voldemort (Ralph Fiennes) is intent on finding the young wizard as quickly as possible, while Harry, Hermoine (Emma Watson) and Ron (Rupert Grint) must find the horcruxes that contain pieces of Voldemort's soul, so they can destroy him and save all of humanity.

Can good defeat evil?

Will anything happen?

It was the most disappointing of all of the Pixar films, but Pixar and Disney are back for more with Cars 2, and I am not sure I am all that excited. 

You may have heard some of the story, but I am ready to tell you the WHOLE story because I know the man in the middle of the controversy.

This week, while all of the biggest stars in country music were in Nashville for the CMAs, Billy Ray Cyrus was making the rounds to promote the re-release of an obscure song he first released in 1989, and one intrepid morning show host, Woody Johnson of WCOL's Woody and the Wake Up Call, had the guts to ask Mr. Achy Breaky Heart about his highly publicized divorce proceedings from Mrs. Achy Breaky Heart/Miley's Mom, Tish Cyrus.  That is, he tried to ask.   

Billy Ray was not very happy.

Of all of the movies in 3D these days, 20th Century Fox couldn't find a way to make the runaway trains screaming down the tracks to their inevitable, explosive doom jump off the screen in 3D?!?!?!? 

Who cares about seeing the Smurfs of Avatar in 3D?  This would have been a perfect use of it.   

Based on a true story, Denzel Washington stars as Frank - a grizzled veteran train engineer assigned to teach the new, wet behind the ears conductor, Will (Chris "Captain Kirk" Pine), the ropes. 

It turns out Will has some pretty hefty connections, and the company wants to phase out some of the old timers, so Frank is ready to grin and bear it, but he won't compromise on safety or doing the job the right way.  

As Will and Frank try to haul a load in Southern Pennsylvania, a pair of morons up north have screwed up, lost control of a train carrying toxic chemicals, and, of course, it's accelerating down the tracks, and heading straight for Frank, Will and their hometown!!!!  

Will Frank and Will save the day?

You have to love a movie with a suggestive title.  

Rachel McAdams stars as Becky - a driven, hardworking television producer who has the chance of a lifetime.  After getting canned from her current gig, she is hired to be the executive producer for the lowest rated network morning show, Daybreak.  As you can imagine, they are the lowest rated morning program for a reason (actually, several reasons), but Becky has a plan.  

Realizing her idol, Mike Pomeroy (Harrison Ford), is sitting around collecting a paycheck after getting replaced as the nightly news anchor, Becky forces him to join the team, and bring some life and respectability to the show.  

Is Mike ready to do morning TV?

Can Becky save the show?

My friend Jim brought this up to me a few months ago, and it looks like Time Warner may be the first  company to deliver brand new movies at home via On Demand the same day they premiere in movie theaters. 

No more fighting the crowds, getting a sitter and having the movie ruined because some idiot kid behind you won't get off the cell phone or the guy three rows in front of you won't stop texting?

The always awesome Nikki Finke's Deadline Hollywood has broken the news that Hugh Jackman has been approached to host the Oscars ... and said no, because he will be filming the next Wolverine movie (Really? We need another one?  Even if it is directed by Darren Aronofsky, I just don't need another Wolverine movie.) 

So, who will host the biggest show in show biz? 

I can't imagine Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin will be all that excited to be second choices, so let's rule them out.

Jon Stewart is super hot right now, but his two tours of duty led to the lowest Oscar ratings EVER. 

David Letterman probably isn't even allowed to watch the Oscars after his turn at bat. 

Jay Leno is not cool and hip enough. 

Jerry Seinfeld has always been mentioned as a dream host, but I fear his time has passed.  Maybe 10 years ago, that would have been awesome, but I can't get as excited today. 

I am going to go out on a very large limb and predict ...  CONAN O'BRIEN!!!!!

Conan showed great ability when he was the host of the Emmys, everyone still supports him after the Leno/Tonight Show fiasco, and it would be a grand return to the days of when Johnny Carson hosted the Oscars. 

Imagine that - the Oscars return to tradition, while also showcasing a modern comedian at the top of his game. 

 

He might not be as prolific in death as Tupac Shakur, but Michael Jackson has a new album coming out December 14, and you can hear the first song, Breaking News, Monday November 8.

Compiled from tracks Jackson had been working on throughout the last few years before his death, Michael is being released in conjunction with the The Michael Jackson Estate.

Are you hoping Santa will leave a copy in your stocking this year?

In this animated film, Will Ferrell provides the voice of Megamind - a brilliant criminal mastermind who has lived his entire life in the shadow of his do-gooder, cocky nemesis, Metro Man (voice by Brad Pitt).  Megamind's latest plot involves kidnapping Metro Man's main squeeze, Roxanne Ritchi (voice by Tina Fey), and, for the first time ever, Megamind wins!  

Now, he doesn't know what to do with himself.   

What will Megamind do without someone to challenge him?

All of the hype makes you think Due Date was going to be as funny as combining Ghostbusters, Caddyshack, Old School and The Hangover all into one movie.  Instead, the result are just "eh".

Robert Downey, Jr. stars as Peter - an expectant father flying from Atlanta to LA, when he runs into a TV star wannabe, Ethan (Zach Galifianakis), who inadvertently gets the two of them kicked off the flight.  Faster than you can say Planes, Trains and Automobiles, the two are stuck trying to make it across country without driving each other crazy.

Will they make it in time for the birth of Peter's baby?

Will they make it at all?

Tyler Perry has a movie coming out and the studio decided to show it to critics!  Does that mean it will be an Oscar nominee?  No.

It's a massive ensemble cast bringing to life the Tony nominated and award winning play from Ntozake Shange (1977's For Colored Girls Who Considered Suicide When The Rainbow Is Enuf). 

Thandie Newton is Tangie - the promiscuous bartender (originally to be played by Mariah Carey before she dropped out). 

Whoopi Goldberg is Alice - Tangie's mother who believes in a strange cult-like religious leader and hopes Tangie will mend her evil ways. 

Tessa Thompson is Nyla - Tangie's sister who is a vibrant dancer Alice loves more than life itself, but she has a new dilemma to face.  

Kimberly Elise is Crystal - a mother in the building who has two small kids and a troubled, violent alcoholic boyfriend, Beau Willie (Michael Ealy).  There's more, but you get the point.

It's a movie ripped from the headlines like an episode of Law & Order, but Sam Waterston has been pushed aside by Sean Penn.  Not a bad trade (but Waterston TOTALLY could have played the role).

Naomi Watts stars as Valerie Plame - a fashionable, successful woman married to former ambassador Joe Wilson (Sean Penn).   However, we learn she is quite secretive about her job, and for good reason.  No one knows Valerie works for the CIA.  That is, no one knows she works for the CIA until someone at the White House blows her cover after Joe writes a scathing op-ed piece in the New York Times.  

Who is the leak?

Why did they expose Valerie?

Can Valerie and Joe get justice?

Will they stay together?

Before you think this is another story about Cruise jumping on a couch or proselytizing about Scientology, I have a bit of admiration for this stunt. And, I really mean stunt.

Cruise is over in Dubai filming the latest Mission Impossible movie, Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol with Paula Patton and Jeremy Renner.  In what must be the opening scene, or the biggest highlight of the movie, Cruise's Ethan Hunt has to hang off the top of the tallest building in the world, the Burj Kahilfa.

And, he's not just hanging there!  Cruise is running across the windows of the building!

You can see photos here.

I have never understood such risky behavior when you are not acting to save your life, save a loved one's life, or trying to impress a woman.  I have to hand it to Cruise.  The man is willing to do whatever it takes to make the movie better.  You might not agree with his religious beliefs, and you might find him a little creepy, but the guy is dedicated to making a good movie.  That's admirable.