November 2010 Archives

Are you a Romantic OverAchiever? You know a woman that is NOT realistic about who she is and what she can bring to a relationship.  These women often get frustrated in relationships because they are always dating people who are not in their lane or out of their league.  If you are constantly frustrated or getting rejected, evaluate your Relationship Market Value (RMV) and be honest with yourself.  Don't always try to be a Romantic OverAchiever and then ask why you can never find a man! 

Before you begin the dating process, it's important to understand your Relationship Market Value (RMV).  Your RMV helps you determine three things:  (1) the characteristics that you bring to a relationship that can be of value or benefit to a mate; (2) what type of guys you can attract so that you can focus your efforts on finding that type of man; and (3) if you are even ready for a relationship.  When determining your Relationship Market Value, you take a close look at your mental/emotional health, financial health, family relationships and other areas of your life, and discover if you are really ready for a relationship.

You determine your RMV by looking at the positive traits that you bring to the table that add value to the relationship, while evaluating the negative ones as well―those that may take something away or create challenges in a relationship.  If you have some real negative traits, such as having eight children and 5 "baby daddies", those things are not going to be perceived positively by a lot of men.  One of my negative traits, gambling, probably rules out the possibility of me marrying a pastor.  (But I enjoy gambling.)  It is important to know your strengths and build upon them so that you can differentiate yourself from other women.  If you are funny, be the funniest, wittiest woman in the room. If you are pretty, smile and be proud to that you can light up a room. 
 

Today there are so many ways to meet and date men.  With online dating, personal matchmakers, speed dating and other methods, you should be able to increase the quantity of men you meet fairly quickly.  So, in this blog, I wanted to focus on the 10 best locations related to men and their work.  These locations include conferences, associations or seminars men attend to enhance their careers.  Since so many of us devote so much time to work-related activities, these are great places to meet men!

1. The Office:  One good thing about meeting men at the office is that they have already been pre-screened by the personnel/HR department.  Thus, there's no better place than the office to meet single, successful men with similar interests and skills.  To get to know co-workers, plan social activities at the job such as monthly happy hours and football or basketball pools.  This will allow you to interact with a lot of men when you plan these activities.  So don't just participate in these activities, but plan and coordinate these events as well.  

• Industry Association Meetings:  If you don't want to date men at your current job, then attend industry events to network and meet new men.  For instance, each industry has associations that gather regularly to advance knowledge sharing in a particular field.  As an example, I've found that the annual conference of the National MBA Association is an awesome place to meet professional men. 

You always want to put yourself in place of confidence for  a first date.  Here are the types of locations that work best for that ever-important first date:

·         Bowling/Playing Pool:  This can be fun, and it's a great way to flirt.  With pool, you get to wear your sexy jeans and lean over the pool table suggestively.

·         Golfing/Miniature Golfing:  Both golf and putt-putt are great options for enjoying the weather and scenery and spending quality time talking.  If you're on a regular golf course, you may want to only play 9 holes, as an 18-hole round could take about four hours. If the date is not going well, that could be way too much time to be together.